Time for another one, first of all thanks to you all
for sharing your stories. This will be a long one!
While going through all this "infertility" the doctors
pretty much told me I would never get pregnant on
my own. I always thought different, call it intuition.
Last October my period was late and I'm pretty regular.
I really didn't think too much about it, I just thought
I was late and then it was about 5 days late so I thought
I would take a test just to know. It turned out positive.
I told my husband "joe" and he said, "you better take
another one." (we were both in disbelief.) Plus I bought
one of the store "cheapies" so we thought maybe they
were defective in some way. I ran to the store and bought
a little more expensive one and took them. They all came
back positive and although we were still skeptical I was
beaming inside. About 10 days later I miscarried. I was
only 6 weeks along, but it was still a let down. Probably
not as much as some because my outlook was just
positive that I even became pregnant without help.
Then this last April I found out I was pregnant again.
I was really optimistic that this one would be fine. Then
I started bleeding again and bled for 5 days. I thought
I had a period so I took another pregnancy test and
it came back postive. I wasn't sure what was happening.
I made an appointment hoping they would just tell me
I was indeed pregnant and send me on my way. I got
there and they wanted to do an ultrasound. I wish I
would have told them no, but how do you say no to that.
I wanted to make sure everything was okay. They did
a vaginal ultrasound and didn't see anything. She told
me it was either because it was too early to detect it
or I could have an ectopic pregnancy. Of course that
night around 3:30 a.m. I awoke to the worst pain I've
ever felt in my whole life. I awoke out of a dream where
I saw 3 bodies who were all in excruciating pain going
from the bottom of my abdomin up to my chest and
then back down again. As I awoke they all merged to
one and it was my body they merged to. Very weird.
I drug myself to the bathroom (not sure why) instict
told me to go to the bathroom. At first I sat to go to the
bathroom which I did go, but the whole time I was
thinking get me off of here. As soon as Iwas done I hit
the floor into a fetal position crying out in agony. Joe
finally came in and I told him to go and research
ectopic pregnancy. I had heard they could be life
threatning, but I wasn't sure why or if that was even
true. Why hadn't I asked the nurse what to expect?
Meanwhile I'm on the bathroom floor moaning and groaning.
I finally managed to get myself back to my bed when Joe
came in and told me if I started feeling shoulder pain that
would mean internal bleeding. Long story short, I did have
an ectopic pregnancy. I started feeling the shoulder pain
about 3 hours after my initial pain and I went in to the
doctor at 9:00a.m. He kept me there and said I would need
surgery right away. It feels like gas bubbles up in your
shoulders; very hard to get comfortable. At around 12:30
I felt a little better and my doctor who was my previous
bishop was second guessing his decision. He thought maybe
he was misdiagnosing me. I told him I didn't want to chance
it so we went ahead with the surgery. He came out not
believing what he found. I had lost a liter of blood and he
had to close off my left tube. Basically, I was pregnant and
the baby was stuck in my tube and was growing there. As
it grew my tube burst. He thought they may have to
do a blood tranfusion so they watched my blood pressure
very closely for 4 hours. I was determined not to be
admitted so I made sure I passed all the required tests to
get the heck outta there. A normal blood pressure is 110 and
mine was down to 64 so it took a bit for it to raise. What a
miserable day that was.
I'm brave to post this picture. Joe took it from his phone
in the recovery room. The nurse, who was soooooooooooo
awesome said as they released me~ that in her 25 years of
being a nurse she has never released anybody who looked
so bad! I was so pale and I mean look at me, not pretty. I
had to chuckle a little bit at her comment though. I hadn't
seen myself but I felt like a was hit by a truck so I knew she
was probably right. I'm not sure how everyone else recovers
from a laparoscopy, but me, not so well. From the moment
I woke up it felt like very sharp stabbing pains up in my
shoulders and neck. I mean it's excruciating. My kids saw
me dealing with this and it freaked them out. Joe didn't
know what to do either. That's what is bad about it is that
there really is nothing you can do. Of course afterward my
mother-in-law told me when she was in the hospital one
time, they tilted her bed so her head was down and she
laid like that for a while and then when she sat up most
of the pain was relieved. Hopefully that will help some of
you if you have to deal with this. All I have to say is that
I'm grateful for my faith. I had Joe give me a preisthood
blessing that morning about 5:00 and then my dad gave
me one about 8:00 that night and instantly the sharp
pains went away. I was still uncomfortable, but nothing
like what I was. Expect to be out for a good 4 or 5 days
after something like this. Get some good friends and
family to come help you. It's really hard to do the easiest
things. One thing I had heard was that you ovulate from
different sides each month so I thought my chances were
cut in half, but my doctor told me that was an old wives
tale so I'm crossing my fingers it can still happen. I'll
keep you posted. I think we may get outside help if
nothing happens by the end of the year. I'll be 30 next
year and I want to be done by 35 so I gotta figure it
out.
Keep the stories coming ladies- Jana Dille
